Friends with Benefits
by I'm gonna raichu a story
Summary: "Jealously? What is the meaning of this word?" UsUk oneshot!


**_I've been thinking about this story so I wrote it, simple enough. Please Review! _  
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**_Disclaimer: I don't own hetalia..._**

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_Look at him_, Arthur thought, staring at the American who was talking to Ivan. _Flirting with that Russian like I'm not even here. I mean sure, he says we're only friends but still, he could at least refrain from doing it while I'm right here. You know what? I'll just ignore him, yeah, that's what I'll do._ Arthur turned his head to look somewhere else, when he suddenly found himself crouching behind a bush, peaking through the leaves to get a better view of the aforementioned couple. _How did I get here?_

"What are you doing?" A voice asked behind him, making the Brit jump.

"What the bloody hell?" Arthur questioned, turning around to see a startled Japanese boy. "I was thinking about something important."

"Oh my, I-I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt your thought process," Kiku apologized frantically.

"It's fine. Hey, did you pass by Alfred and Ivan? Did you hear what they were saying?"

"What? No, eavesdropping is very rude."

"But if walk past them and just happen to hear their conversation, it's not really your fault now is it?" Arthur reasoned.

"I suppose..."

"So you really weren't being rude, were you?"

"If you put it that way..."

"Exactly. Plus, you kind of owe me since you snuck up on me so impolitely."

"I guess I do, well, all I heard was that they were planning on going to the movies later." _So clearly you were eavesdropping, but of course that's not impolite. It's fact that you're telling me about it, that makes the whole ordeal considered rude._

"What? That bloody wanker," Arthur whispered angrily looking back at Alfred when he saw a certain Frenchman. _Perfect, If he wants to flirt with that Russian, I'll just with flirt with that frog_, he thought as he ran up to the boy.

"Hey Francis," the Englishman greeted, putting his hand on the blond's shoulder.

"_Bonjour_ Beautiful," the blue-eyed man replied, smiling at the Brit. _Crap, did he just flirt with me? I should flirt back, right? Of course you should flirt back, you're trying to make that blasted American jealous, remember? What should I say? Just say anything, Francis does it all the time. If a Frenchman can do it, then surely a respected Englishman like myself can do it. Crap, he's staring at me! Say something! Say anything!_

"Your have hair on your head. That's nice."

"_Quoi?_" the blond asked, looking at Arthur quizzically. But before the Brit had a chance to respond, a sudden flash of dirty blond hair appeared and the next thing he knew, he saw Francis on the floor clutching his nose screaming something about a _stupide américain. Wait, Américain. American. Alfred. _He looked around to find the perpetrator and was surprised to see him talking to Ivan aimlessly. _How'd he do that so fast? _The Englishman approached Alfred and tapped him on his shoulder lightly, not wanting to intrude on their conversation. He was still talking to the Russian afterall.

"Hey guys, I don't want to interrupt, but... I kind of wanted to speak to Alfred alone." Arthur said tentatively. Ivan glared at the Brit suspiciously as if deciding whether or not to kill him for interrupting his conversation, but ended up nodding his head in agreement.

"Fine, I was going to go get coffee anyway." The indigo-eyed man went to a coffee cart nearby to go get his drink.

"Okay, now that the creepy Russian is gone...Why the bloody hell did you do that?!"

"What do you mean?" the American answered innocently.

"I mean, why did you attack Francis?" Arthur explained, pointing towards the paramedics placing the Frenchman on a gurney.

"Well, would you take a look at that, I guess I did. So, what are you doing later? I was thinking maybe we could meet up."

"What? No! I will do nothing of the sort. You still haven't answered my question. Why did you punch Francis?"

"He was putting all off his frenchy little moves on you. I was simply protecting you, like us heroes are programmed to do."

"Who's to say I didn't want him to?" the dirty blond argued.

"You did. Every time he comes near you, you basically run away screaming 'Stay the hell away from me you bloody pervert'."

"Okay 1., as a true Englishman, I do not 'run away', I simply walk away quickly. And 2., what makes you think that this time wasn't different? I came up to him. You have no right to interfere with my personal life! We're just friends with benefits, remember?"

"Okay, okay, sorry," Alfred said, putting his hands up in defeat. "Next time, I'll let Francis have his way with you, sheesh." the American turned around and went to go join Ivan at the drink stand. _Ha! That showed him! _the green-eyed man thought happily to himself.

"How did it go?" Kiku asked, seemingly appearing out of nowhere.

"What the-? Damn Kiku, did Matthew teach you how to do that? Like a freaking ninja, I swear," Arthur cried. "And if you must know, it went perfectly. I made it crystal clear to Alfred to we are just friends with benefits."

"So, mission accomplished?"

"No. No, not really. He already told me that we were simply friends having sex together." the Brit realized.

"So nothing changed, was that you intention?"

"No. It was to make him so jealous by flirting with that frog, that he would ask me to be more than just friends!"

"What happened then?"

"That goddamn Yankee bastard tricked me!"

"How?"

"I don't know! Ask him! He probably did some kind of crazy voodoo magic on me or something!"

"What are you going to do now?"

"I-I don't know," Arthur murmured sadly, looking down at his feet, but quickly snapped out of it once he realized what he was doing. "Stop asking me all these bloody questions! I've got work to do!" And with that, the Englishman swiftly ran off.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" the Japanese boy cried out after him. "I shouldn't have been badgering you with all those questions. That was very impolite of me!"

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**If you like this story, first review, then go check out my other UsUk "Cake"! Also, if you have any suggestions for another chapter, please review or p.m. me!**


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